A Pastoral Response to Fifty Shades of Grey

Although  not an iron-clad rule, men’s pornography is primarily visual; women’s pornography has a story line. Give a man a picture, and his mind jumps into bed. Give a woman a passionate, romantic, erotic story, and she is hungry for more than she’s getting. With Fifty Shades of Grey coming out this week in movie theaters, you have both images and a story—a deadly combination.

Sadly, this movie is being marketed at Valentine’s day as an alternative to candy and flowers. The book and movie depict perverted sexual practices—bondage and sadomasochism, in which the dominant person in the relationship ties up the willingly submissive one and inflicts pain.

According to a recent radio broadcast by Focus on the Family Christian women are being encouraged by their friends to read the book in order to spice up their sex lives. And Christian women are falling for this lie.

Pornography, whether directed at men or at women, stimulates sexual desire, but it implants unrealistic fantasies in the mind. A real man or a real woman can never live up to the fantasies indulged in by a porn addict. For that reason porn is exceedingly damaging to marriage relationships. One Christian woman mentioned on the Focus program became so addicted to erotic novels, that they consumed her whole waking moments. The Holy Spirit literally stopped her as she was headed out the door, suitcase in hand, planning to leave her family in search of the lifestyle that had captured her heart. The Spirit stopped her, and He turned her heart around.

Now the devil may say to you, “You really won’t know what everybody is talking about unless you see/read Fifty Shades of Grey. You owe it to yourself to find out so that you can decide for yourself.” That is exactly the line he used with Eve when he told her that the forbidden fruit would enable her to really know good and evil.

The devil may also say to you, “You’re strong. You can handle it. It won’t hurt you.” Again, that is exactly what he said to Eve: “You shall not surely die.”

I urge you not to fall for the devil’s lies, and if you have already fallen for them, seek help. I will be glad to support you in your quest for spiritual freedom, and I can point you to some other resources. Jesus is the only one who gives freedom to sin’s slaves (John 8:31-36).